Anicha Anicha

Well, the digital didn't show til yesterday. So here is my life, no job as of last night but a potential interview? waiting in the wings. And another restaurant gig as a good possibility, with a killer talented chef friend of mine--her dream come true!! tho the plans keep getting pushed back for the opening date. And me, robo-eating like these fricken doughnuts might catch me a buzz or help me forget the night or at least drop me some of my inhibitions and make me dance better, sure I dont want to wait tables for the rest of my life but confused as to any other move. We shall see...letting the river flow is what I say I am doing but the rib-grease on my face, if I consider too deeply, clues me in to perhaps some deeper feelings of untapped stress...

Getting ready for Kat's wedding this weekend. And instead of looking for jobs, just hoping on this one phone call and otherwise researching grad schools. Been a couple of years, and anti-institution as I am I still am having these moments where I catch myself, like, Seriously? Seriously are you thinking of getting involved in the dogma of academia again? Then I check my righteousness and my own common roadblock of me and remember with a breathless swing how much I love knowledge and NEED and CRAVE stimulation. Then I think about having a smoke. And laugh and roll my eyes at myself cuz I sure do change from day to day. Or minute to minute. Anicha Anicha, this is Sanskrit: Changing. Changing. The nature of all things....The river as it flows...

(Ughhgh too deep for me right now. Chips and salsa it is.)

Here are pics from my farm, followed by a brief poem by moi.


"My Tree"


Sunflowers in the garden







The Only Truth is Change

I have all

the whole perfect world

balanced

on this thin silver of

this tip

oh pencilprint

oh failure

oh searching

oh simple

several

masks of god

oh blessed blasphemy

of me